Author Topic: Fiction's Cool Nuzlocke Run for Attractive People  (Read 1477 times)

JackMcDack

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Fiction's Cool Nuzlocke Run for Attractive People
« on: March 17, 2014, 12:53:04 AM »


We're doing this, bro. We're making it happen.

Pokemon FireRed was released alongside LeafGreen in September 2004 in the US. Both games were enhanced remakes of the classic Pokemon games, Red and Blue, released in 1996. They were remade to counteract the inability to trade up from the original Gameboy, meaning that you could still have pokemon from the Kanto region in your  Ruby, Sapphire, and Emerald games.

Of course, this completely forgot about the Johto region, but that was later rectified by HeartGold and SoulSilver for the jump from the Gameboy Advance/SP to the DS, so shut up about it.

This game actually holds a pretty special place in my heart; this was the first pokemon game I ever acquired, and if I remember correctly it might have even been the first Gameboy SP game I ever owned. Many an hour were sunk into this game after school. Of course, I got this game around the time Diamond and Pearl were a thing, so no one was actually playing it, but I've always taken pride in my ability to get video games and video game systems an entire gaming generation after they were cool.

So yes, this is a Nuzlocke run. The first one I've ever done, in fact, and I'm going all the fuck out with the rules on this. Like the opening theme of Psyche, I'd "rather run when you can't crawl".

I don't have a specific name for this type of run, so, uh... the rules are as follows:

-The first pokemon on any route is the only one I'm allowed to catch. That's the first obvious rule.
-I cannot heal at any Pokecenter. That's the second obvious rule.
-Any fainted pokemon is considered dead and cannot be revived. That's the third obvious rule, BUT, there's a catch.
-Any fainted pokemon in the party is a fallen brother, and must be carried with the party. Live pokemon can be boxed and replaced at any time. HMs can still be used from a fainted pokemon, as their spirit still watches over and grants us favors for honoring their memory.
-I cannot heal any pokemon until they are at Red. Through our suffering, we gain strength. This doesn't sound too much like a pain on it's own, right? Well...
-I cannot heal a pokemon outside of battle - only inside. Battlegrounds are sacred grounds, and healing is a sacred practice.
-PP CAN NOT be restored. The enemy observes our tactics often, so we must never over-use any move they could learn.
-If a Pokemon levels up and gains a move, it MUST learn it. What we learn through battle is knowledge we must never ignore.
-A Pokemon CAN NOT learn TMs (HMs are fine). These 'teaching mechanisms' are false prophets created by our enemies to trick us.

Well, I've set myself up for quite a challenge, haven't I? Well, then, LET'S SEE WHERE THIS JOURNEY TAKES US.



Oh man. That face. That beautiful, beautiful face. I get so nostalgic seeing Professor Oak. So many memories. So beautiful.

Honestly, though, this game is one that gets me quite nostalgic. Sitting alone at a table after school, absorbed in a world all to myself. Silently plotting everyone else's eventual deaths. It's something we all have memories of, right?

...Right?

Well, anyway, he asks us if we're a boy or a girl (I picked boy, obviously), and we jump straight into gameplay wi-

Wait.



I have to name myself?

Uh...

...

...

...

How about, uh...

...

No, that's stupid...

...

Hm...

...Uh...

...

...Fuck this, man, this is WAY too hard. I quit.